 We
all are familiar with the seepage of geek-speak into common English. Terms like “DSL,”
“broadband” and “CD-ROM” appear in newspapers and on TV every day.Recently, however, something more insidious has occurred. Geeks are
using both technical and everyday terms in ways that reduce the precision of language and
obscure meaning. Even worse, lawyers sometimes aid and abet this effort.
Lost in space
In Silicon Valley, businesses no longer operate or compete in markets
or industries. Instead, they exist in “spaces.”
Clients are “in the B2B (business-to-business) space” or
“in the ASP (application service provider) space.” To appreciate how silly this
is, imagine saying, “I am in the complex litigation space” or “the estates
and trusts space.”
The word “media” receives special abuse. It is bad enough
that the public treats this plural noun as singular: “The media is to blame.”
Tech companies do that, but even worse, they use “media” when they really should
use a different word.
“Media” can refer properly to removable objects on which
one records information, such as diskettes and tapes. The improper use is to refer to one
of those objects. For example, I have tape backup software that says, “Please insert
a media into the backup device.”
Back in the days when “computer” and “mainframe”
were synonymous, we called an individual tape or disk a “volume,” like a volume
of an encyclopedia. So, my software should say “Please put a volume into the backup
device.” It appears that as mainframes evolved to PCs, “volume” was lost.
Price increases
Vendors do whatever they can in their contracts to camouflage price
increases. These efforts have produced two of my favorite euphemisms.
The first is “uplift,” which strikes me as more appropriate
for a motivational speech or a Wonderbra ad. Example: “If Customer chooses a
three-hour rather than four-hour response time for on-site maintenance, there will be a
five percent uplift on the annual maintenance fee.”
The other euphemism is “grossed-up,” which makes me think
of the movie Animal House. Example: “Payments shall be grossed-up to provide Vendor
the same amount after such tax as it would have received without the impositions of that
tax.”
Measuring bandwidth
“Bandwidth” is a technical term that refers to how fast a
connection can move data. Bandwidth typically is expressed as thousands, millions or
billions of bits per second.
Nowadays, however, “bandwidth” can refer to almost any
capacity. Suppose that I say, “I just don’t have the bandwidth to do this
project.” Speaking of myself, I probably mean that I do not have enough time.
On the other hand, if I say, “John just doesn’t have the
bandwidth to do this project,” I could mean two different things: Either John does
not have the time, or he is not smart enough (his brain lacks bandwidth).
I admit that mangled language is not one of the world’s great
problems. Nevertheless, I believe that if lawyers help clients recognize proper use of
language rather than perpetuating misuse, we will provide a valuable service to everyone.
 Dana Shultz is vice
president and legal counsel for an international financial services organization, where he
specializes in technology licensing and related transactions. His e-mail address is dhshultz@ds-a.com.
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